Another week, and my opinion has not swayed. Work surely sucks.

Anyway, let me share with you an invaluable life lesson that I learned the hard way. After reading (and scrutinizing) this blog entry, I guarantee that you will learn how to spot a fake.

It all began Wednesday evening...

I had just got out of work, off of my 11 hour shift of flipping veggie burgers. I was walking home, through Compton, when I suddenly realized that I was completely lost and disoriented... must've been the veggie burger fumes.

After almost an hour of walking through a graveyard filled with camaflouged snakes, I finally make my way out and spot someone. So, I approach the guy. The following conversation ensues:

Me: Hey, do you know how to get to Burbank?
Guy: Hmm, let me think about it.
Me: Okay.
Guy: You know Paparazzi Ave?
Me: No, sorry, not really.
Guy: Hmm. Okay, follow this street down 4 more blocks.
Me: Okay.
Guy: No, wait let me think about it again.
Me: Okay.
Guy: Right, 4 blocks. I was thinking it might've been 3.
Me: Heh.
Guy: Cause I can never remember whether there's an actual light in front of the Denny's.
Me: True.
Guy: Huh?
Me: Oh, nothing.
Guy: Did you say true?
Me: Um, maybe, I don't remember. Why?
Guy: I dunno.
Me: Heh.
Guy: Okay, anyway, where were we?
Me: 4 blocks down this road?
Guy: Yea, okay... so go down 4 blocks, then turn right onto Wild Ass Street.
Me: Hmm, ok.
Guy: Alright, got that so far?
Me: Yea.

[5 minute pause]

Me: Okay, go on.

[1 minute pause]

Me: Okay.

[1 minute pause]

Me: Yea?

[30 second pause]

Me: Hello?

[30 second pause]

Me: Yo!

[15 second pause]

Me: Yo wtf, man. You suck!!!!!!!!


And then it happened!


I realized I had been talking to a talking statue this entire time. So tricky. I looked around me, slightly embarrassed, and noticed a gang of deadly hoodlums playing with machetes laughing at me. A tear slowly trickled down my face and formed a pool of blood at my feet.

The lesson, my friend, is to never talk to a person that's 20-foot tall and made of stone surrounded by a small fence. That is in all likelihood a FAKE person. A fake person will only waste your precious time and possibly feed you faulty information (as the case for me).

Categories: fake [t], life lesson [t]

What size undies are those? :D Btw, Have you met Jay Leno yet? :P
» little-b on 2006-08-12 12:06:32

. . . Are you on any meds, Dave?
» Dilated on 2006-08-12 12:51:44

LOL! That's so crazy! Poor you. XD
» Kirei on 2006-08-12 12:55:34

Training dogs.....
lol I don't know I've never tried.
» Kirei on 2006-08-12 02:42:01

well, you obviously remember saying "true"
and im very glad you made it out alive. those hoodlums!
» middaymoon on 2006-08-12 12:04:25

Dave's high on life. :P
» little-b on 2006-08-12 12:44:02

i usually just charge 15 credits because the renters don't usually get that much traffic from my site. and i always forget to advertise for them in my blog. SOME people charge like... 150 or some crazy number like that.
» Chloefoxx on 2006-08-13 11:58:17

LOL! Oh, Dave
I have telepathic powers or sumfin or nuffin. That is how I know the information. But I guess I can't be sure that I actually know the things I think I do.

Did the fake person have those blue pants on while you were talking to him? And I can't believe he thought he could get away with telling you to go down streets with such names! How insolent.
» okidpokie on 2006-08-15 08:10:50

work....im with u dave
lmao u made my day afta my longggggg day at work and soon another longggggger day. lol thx so wen we get $ it get snt 2 were?
» k0rn on 2006-08-16 12:52:03

haha
funny entry. thanks dave for brightening up my day.
» siti84 on 2006-08-18 01:39:06

hmmm be careful
they dont play around out here and dont talk to anyone thats flaming.......(i.e. showing their colors) or they'll take you for everything you have....oh yeah and btw Vote for me on NWF!
» finelegsforever on 2006-08-18 09:22:59

Wild Ass St., verses Tame Ass St. lol =P
those statues can be so sneaky...
» invisible on 2006-08-18 10:54:10

Well tell your host that xanga shouldn't suck so much. :p
» ikimashokie on 2006-08-21 12:07:16

lol good stuff, certainly made em laugh
» Nrgjester on 2006-09-21 12:42:53

lol..
» jen on 2006-10-14 06:21:12

Name.

URL.

[to enter your email, use "mailto:youremail@domain.com"]
Subject.

Comment.

Word verification.

Copy the first 4 characters only.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.