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Support my College Education
by: dave

NuTang is completely free to everyone! Well, sadly enough, that is a little white lie. You see, it is completely free to everyone—everyone, but me (alias: dave).

Let me tell you a little story about myself. When I was 8 years old, my limbs became gangrenous. However, due to the abject financial status of my family, I could not afford to go to the doctor. Rather, while I bit on a thin piece of cheese clothe to ease the pain, my brother used a blunt butter knife to cut off my arms and legs.

Though miraculously my limbs grew back, they are grotesquely mishapen. When I wobble down the streets, mean little kids always throw roadkill and rodent excrements at me; and all the while chanting "Kill the beast! Kill the beast!"

When I was 12, a bully knocked off my half-foot thick glasses. In my flustered state, I stumbled off the curb of the sidewalk. A Greyhoundandthefox bus ran by and ran over my face in an instant.

I knew, then, that I must change my wretched, pitiful state. And, the only way is to receive a proper college education. Going to college became my dream—my obsession.

Now, again, lady fate bitch slapped me across my face. Based on my meager McDonaldDuck's $5.12/hour earnings, I realize I must choose between maintaining NuTang.com and my lifelong dream of completing college. Of course, I choose Nutang.com. If only I could do both, if only...

Thanks: Papagoya [$5]

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